This bridge is very temporary.
It is not a land bridge. It is not a steel bridge. It is not a bridge through the air, or over water. And it is certainly not The Rainbow Bridge.
Try to remember the domain name. And also who registered it. if you ever meet me, or if your name happens to be Snackness, you will know why I chose my name.
A Dr. Who reference? Perhaps in part.
But there is more to that symbolism. It dates all the way back to the year that my husband left me: 2008.
We separated in 2007, but 2008 was the year I knew he was not coming back. That was a long time ago. As to why I did not remarry?
Well, it was not for lack of offers…
I count at least five serious discussions. Three with other hackers, one with a professional journalist (correspondent for Bloomberg, published in the Wall Street Journal and HBR), and one with a soldier, during peacetime.
And yes, there was one marriage proposal (made by me) that was accepted.
The man later changed his mind. The reasons he gave were unconvincing. I could tell the full story, I guess, but that might get him in trouble. Legal trouble. So better to bring this blog post to a close.
I was invited to a wedding today, by a man whom I believe has romantic intentions toward me. It is in the Bay Area. I am not there! Too bad, I guess. I am 48 years old. I know he probably really is my last chance at happiness. I did once tell another lover, years ago — and yes, he was one of those who wanted to marry me — happiness is not something I value as much as most. Why not?
You would have to cross the bridge to find out. But please be aware, that site is not secure. I have been extremely ill this year: a bacterial respiratory infection that manifested neurological symptoms, including seizure-like events and lost time. (I think part of the issue may have been a supplement that I was taking: Fisetin. Not all supplements are safe.)
Let me just say this. Happiness, is, I think overrated. But I always assumed I could survive just fine on my own and be ok. I didn’t anticipate the extent of sex discrimination I would experience, even in the United States of America. Nor the intense fragility of the social safety net reserved for people with disabilities. Some of us want to work. Some of us believe that we have a lot to give, and to contribute. There are very few legal or economic protections for those of us who choose to keep working and learning. That is something I would like to change, but in all honesty, when the building is on fire your priority cannot be grabbing the fire extinguisher. It has to be getting out.